Whenever I send my husband mail about the house, and he doesn't respond, I really have to fight the urge to call him. It makes me feel panicked, like he's mad at me. How stupid is that? What can he do? He's already gone. Nothing worse that can happen. So what if he's angry?
I'm more upset because yesterday I called his father to wish him happy birthday. I left a message on the answering machine. I was happy not to talk to anyone. At the same time, I confidently assumed someone-- his mother, someone-- would call me back. Nobody did. Nobody and nothing.
I caught a glimpse of myself on the train and I really looked old and tired. My lower face is showing my age. I looked like an old woman. But I don't feel that way.
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